i smooth out the tired dreams in my blanket, yawning as my blood starts to flow quicker. i have softer dreams than most people. i dreamed about this boy of happiness and curly hair. he gingerly picked up the guitar. i wasn't expecting much. but he played this song, and his fingers flew across the frets, and i was laughing so hard that you could hear my laughter from a block away.
i want to tell you that he's the same kid, that bravery blush on his cheeks, but i cannot. some part of him grew up and gave up, and there's a piece missing.
but that's okay.
i know that might sound a bit silly to you. what part of that sounds okay? but it was a day in the middle of winter, and i stared into his eyes, and something deep in my heart clicked into place. He is loved.
so i brush the night out of my hair, and i wash forgotten memories from my face, and stare out the window with a crooked grin. let me walk in the hope and the love of Christ, selflessness left in every footstep.
no dwelling on the past.
/x
lolz this is a little short, but that's okay. words have been walking in molasses so I'm having trouble getting them out.
p.s. the giveaway is still up! enter enter enter. there are good things there.
soo peaceful and lovely. and SPRING BLOSSOMS. *heart eyes*
ReplyDeletewords in molasses = my life rn. but I just made molasses cookies so that's good, right? AND I NEED TO ENTER THAT NOW, WOW.
awfejafha. i KNOW. i see them and i'm struck with the loudest joy.
DeleteALSO I'M LAUGHING PLEASE CAN I HAVE THE MOLASSES COOKIES INSTEAD??? weep. x
it's late and I'm tired. and I am reading with bleary eyes and a spent soul and\\\ when you say 'laughing so hard' I can suddenly feel the bubble of happiness and hurt inside.
ReplyDeleteand the light and the wind and the freedom clashing with the bittersweet and sad and ache in in my chest. these words are so delicious and I can't help but drink them up
oh how thankful I am for you and this piece.
I needed this today ahhhh
i don't know. you being here just makes sense. you reading these words and feeling it and the truth and the honesty and the raw raw words that hit your heart. WEEEEEEP. i needed you today. eyes on the good things. eyes on Christ. x
DeleteGolly your photos are amazing. <3 <3
ReplyDeleteThis short piece is so so beautiful. I can feel what you're trying to say and it's wonderful. Keep it up.
Sophy
lavender & blue
gollybobs you are making me cry. awhrafafa. GOD IS GOOD. so let's shout it. thank you, Sophia girl. xx
Deleteyour poetry makes me want to print it out in a hardbound book and march to the top of a mountain and read it aloud to the trees. it's beautiful.
ReplyDeletestay lovely my friend. <3
ok stop stop right now before i flood my house with these TEARS. HAHAHEHRGA. this heart glows a little bit brighter with your kind words. thanks vivian. x
DeleteOH MY GOODNESS! This is such a good piece of writing!!!! You hooked me from the first sentence. It's such a beautiful one by the way!! EP! <3 And then brushing away the dream SO CLEAVER! I'm about to read this again.
ReplyDeletePictures are really lovely too!
CAN I SHOUT THAT BACK AT YOU. i'm laughing so hard. this is my life smushed into words. weep weep weep. THANK YOU. x
Deletethis hurts in a beautiful way. wow wow i admire everything that you write, so good my dear friend <3
ReplyDeletegotta wipe these tears from my eyes real quick one sec. *dies laughing* you are so kind and dear to meeeee. owie. x
Delete*cries* Goodness. How I've missed your writing. This is so so so so so BEAUTIFUL. I could read it over and over again. <3
ReplyDeleteEVEEEEEEEEEEE. Never has that made me happier to hear. WOOOOOOO. I've missed your precious face in this bloggy world. THANK YOU. x
DeleteI want to know more. I want to know what happened and how he's broken. Ugh! Gorgeous as always, dear.
ReplyDeletethe thing about this that makes me laugh is because i've known him for almost five years and i don't have a clue what happened, hannah girl. but something changed. who knows. God has him. no worries. moving on. LOVES. THANK YOU. x
Delete(wait but walking in molasses??? HONESTLY THOUGH how is this so accurate and funny all at once)
ReplyDeletethis breaks my heart a little (ok a lot) and makes me wanna hug you and guitar boy. things that are left behind are too precious to lose to time. He's too good to us, we are just wanderers with our hearts breaking and mending and it's all good.
IT"S OK IF IT"S SHORT i love every word of it xx
i wrote that and i was like, "should i reword it? .... no." ajwfeija. glad you liked it.
Deletemanneiesans. okay yeah. he's moved on, and i see it in his face that grew too old before i came back. but God has taken him from my hands. nothing left here. so we nod our heads in acknowledgement when we see each other but nothing more. but it's all good. like you said. because our God is mighty and gentle and knows what I need. yep yep yep.
love every word u leave. x THANKS FOR MAKING ME CRY AND LAUGH AND GROW BRIGHTER ALL AT THE SAME TIME.
I just want to hug you right now
ReplyDeletehugs make me almost as happy as cinnamon rolls, u precious girl. (wahwfhahfaa CERTAIN HUGS MAKE ME HAPPIER I GOTTA ADMIT) x love u.
DeleteI saw a boy once, hurting so bad, and it haunted me. But it was late at night for me, when something deep in my heart clicked into place, and I knew he'd be okay. I relate to this a lot, and I like how your writing leaves a place for our stories. xx
ReplyDeleteit's written into our hearts, i guess. to care for those ones. where did they come from? man man man. God is good. you're so sweet. thank youuuuu beyond words, Jessica. love love love. x
Deleteoh dang this is beautiful
ReplyDeleteoh man that's good to know x
Delete